she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
Also I think I drunkenly signed up to be an uber driver or something because they keep emailing me to fill out a background check
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize