We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
Randomize
