Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
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