I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
Randomize
