I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
I need to sanitize my soul.
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
Randomize
