These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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