We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
Randomize
