So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
Tell her she can't have a vagina
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
Randomize
