a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
Randomize