after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
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