Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
and i looked up. we had an audience...
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
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