I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
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