Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
Randomize
