He is such a slut. More and more my type.
no, he came in my armpit
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
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