I'm really into asian looking animals
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
