Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
I'm, like, this 🤏🏼 close to buying crocs
And you're also 🤏🏼 to never putting your dick inside me again
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