Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
Randomize