and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
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