While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
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