so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
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