K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
My night just got really weird. In a sit down stall bathroom at this nice resturaunt and this guy walks in as I rip a humongous porcelain-splitting fart. Well, I hear him stop for a second. He then opens the door to the stall next to mine, sits down and says, "player two has entered the game."
Did you win?
be right there i have to get my cape
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
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