I wish I only lived at night.
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
Randomize
