All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
Randomize
