I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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