I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
These 19 Guys Hit The Cougar Jackpot
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
35 Disappointing People Who Failed At Sexting
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax