You work out of a Hotel?
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
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