I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
There's a walmart bag of my vomit outside my front door. I just really need someone to appreciate that with me.
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
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