I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
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