You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
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