That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize
