No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Randomize
