You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
Sacagawea was the original milf.
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Randomize
