Are we in a gay sports bar?
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
