i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
Randomize
