Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
Randomize
