I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
Randomize