Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
Randomize
