is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Randomize
