wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
Randomize
