I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
grandma shit on top of the toilet
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Randomize