best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
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