I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
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