check it out our google latitudes are spooning
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
Randomize
