i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
