No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
So here I am, sexting at work.
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
