I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Randomize
