C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
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I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
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