her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
Randomize
