Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
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