I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
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