I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
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